Step by Step

Day 20

Stumbles -
Temptations - For a while I've wondered about personal temptations. It has felt like Satan wasn't really worried about me (which worried me) and I was just coasting along. The phrase "If you aren't moving forward you are moving backward" concerned me. As I have started making goals and moving toward those goals, I have begun to see and feel temptations. So while I have felt and fallen to temptations over these past days, I've also begun to learn what temptations look like and feel like for me. I've appreciated this new perspective. And I thought it was interesting that temptations come as we move forward... hmmm. I think that needs more pondering.

Exercise - is soooo boring. My mind goes a million miles an hour thinking of everything I need to be doing. It was sooo hard to stay exercising and so easy to justify moving on to other needs. My mind felt very scattered.

Steps forward -
Tracking - while I had some very high point days, I have tracked almost every day. It has been more about accountability than anything. This journey is a spiritual journey as well as a physical one and this accountability is a big one. I've also thought about being honest in every detail. If you can be honest with yourself, you can be honest with others.

Planning- I've been diligent in going to the store and making sure I have food on hand. There is a large learning curve to healthy eating. I have a long way to go but I have see the importance of keeping the kitchen stocked and being prepared. I think there is a spiritual lesson here...

Exercise - the first few days of exercise were miserable. Then I took a day where I didn't turn on a podcast or music and let my mind wander. Instead, I just prayed. Literally. I poured out my heart out about my life and when I looked at the clock a minute later, I saw that 16 mins. had passed! I continued praying, really talking and after, I turned on a new playlist that had some songs from Heartland (favorite show). The songs felt like they were being sung to me by the Savior. I LOVE these songs now. Some of the are romantic songs but I feel like they are between myself and the Savior. In the days that have followed, I have looked forward to working out. To that time with Him. I can not over state this blessing. It was unexpected. I am so grateful for these moments.

Food - I am re-discovering fruits and veggies. I have loved savoring the blessings of fresh foods and the simplicity of the basics. I am only buying from the store so I know it is a pale imitation of garden fresh. I am looking forward to farmer's markets and garden fresh from my own garden.

Onward -
I am working on fine tuning the learning curve, meal by meal. I also want to find more recipes, healthy yet scrumptious as well. Healthy gourmet is my goal. I am also working on sleep. If I don't get enough sleep, it is really hard to exercise and even harder to avoid chocolate.

I have lost 6.8 lbs. My jeans fit better. I don't feel quite like a sausage. Onward and upward.
Jewels